I can identify with what many have gone through with people telling them that their relationship with a Dominican can never work out. I am a pale white woman from an italian family and my fiance is Domincan. We have been together for almost two years now and although rocky at first we have survived the hard first year and are happier now than either of us thought possible.
I met my fiance about 3 1/2 years ago when I was married to an english man (who by the way was exactly what people told me my fiance would turn out to be...con-man, womanizer, thief, user, abuser, etc.) and we turned into quick friends (I know I know men and women can't be JUST friends). But either way we were very quick close friends. He was in a long term relationship with another latin woman (forgive me I can't remember if she was Puerto Rican or Portugese) who made him absolutely miserable. In the start we became friends in an attempt to find solace in each other to complain and feel less isolated in our relationships. My ex husband stole from me all the time from our joint bank account, cheated on me constantly and forced me at all costs to break off friendships that gave me any support to leave him. (Yeah I know "why did you let it happen for so long?" don't ask) Eventually I decided to file for divorce and didn't mention anything to my now fiance since I thought we are friends and nothing more (don't get me wrong I always thought he was a hottie) besides he was involved in a relationship and as a fellow female I respected the boundaries of our friendship.
I guess it was about three months after I filed for divorce that my fiance called me and told me it was over with him and his live in girlfriend. It was saddening to hear him so depressed. I stayed in closer contact with him and let him know a few weeks after his ex moved out that I had filed for divorce months back and that we would be divorced by March 2003.
Immediately he was so happy to hear this that he asked me to come for a visit in NY (I was living in NJ at the time). I agreed and we met for a quick dinner and a movie at his apartment. He had no furniture at that time since his ex took all of it with her but we curled up on the floor together bundled in a comforter and we watch a horrible comedy that we just about threw out the window. Numerous times he left the room and would come back with little things like snacks, drinks, etc. I missed work the next day because we stayed up all night and talked about our lives, likes, dislikes, our families and our friendship. That was when we looked each other in the face and realized that our friendship had a possibility of working as a relationship.
We gave it a shot (nothing to lose right?) and within months I was moving my own home up to NYC to live in his apartment. He bought new furniture and built me a walk in closet for my clothes, rearranged his life to fit me in. Only after I moved in did we fight back and forth (but I am a horrible roommate) but even those days passed quickly.
He has three wonderful children and 18 year old daughter (who he rarely gets the chance to see since she is "too old" to be babied), a 15 year old daughter and a 12 year old son, both of which I love as if they are my own. I never wanted to get involved with a man that had children or a past of broken hearts. He is both and his life has made him the person he is today. A successful self employed father of three and love of my life. I can't tell any of you how many times I look at his face and wonder "how did this happen?" I waited 27 years of my life (obviously not when I was a baby but still) to meet the man I am with now. I have found what it is that I was seaching for in this man. He makes me smile inside and out when I think of him or hear his voice or even see his number show up on my cell phone in the middle of the day. I have never felt so treasured by anyone else in my life and I thank god everyday for being kind enough to bring us together.
Ok that was way too long....
Dessie