I tried to tell you, Robert...

[JDJones]

Due to inherit a fortune when his sickly, widower father died, Robert decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So he went to a singles bar and he searched until he spotted a woman whose beauty took his breath away.


"Right now, I'm just an ordinary man," he said to her, "but within a month or two, my father will pass and I'll inherit over 20 million dollars."


The woman went home with Robert.


Four days later she became his stepmother.



Moral: Men will never learn

[paddy]

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community.

The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection
and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly.
He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin.
Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects,
including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California
Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain
Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described
Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.

Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life
was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very
smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked
schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was
a crusty old man and was considered a roll model for
millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children,
John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven.
He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The
funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise
to the occasion and take time to pass it on and share that
smile with someone else who kneads it.