casual sex?

[mkohn]

I think men have nurturing and caring instincts too, some just "tune out" when their ^^^ is doing the talking.

mk

[Pib]

MK you are right on both counts.

[andy a]

Am I missing something?

1)
"Casual" was found in the Cambridge International Dictionary of English at the entries listed below.

casual (NOT INTERESTED)
casual (TEMPORARY)
casual (CHANCE)
casual (INFORMAL)

Which interpretation is insulting? The comment itself was meant to be somewhat satirical.

2)
Isn't this the forum where men and women are expected to have different viewpoints? Are women really from Venus or men from Mars?

If it's an unwritten rule that this forum is one where those "from Venus" can say what they want and others are brutes for responding, then I will certainly stay away from this forum.

4)
Is there some reason the offended party can't speak for herself?

3)
I didn't just fall off the yucca truck. The archives are full of posts telling men how foolish they would be to marry a Dominican, and advising them about the high divorce rate. One doesn't have to be Sherlock Holmes to notice that many Dominican women have children from multiple men.

OF COURSE THERE ARE EXCEPTIONS TO ANYTHING AND ONE IS AT LIBERTY TO INCLUDE HIMSELF (OR HERSELF) IN THOSE EXCEPTIONS.

I don't recall having ever called anyone out by name in a negative way on this board.

Why do people post unless they want responses? In those posts, a bit of satire and levity can help to keep the discussion lively, yet friendly. In a different thread, I made an accurate (but I hoped comical) statement about Dominicans' use of toilet paper, and got an assinine reply. I ignored it. Sometimes it's better to simply go on.

[Amber]

Maybe all of you are both right and wrong to some degree. First let me clarify that many Dominicans do not take sex so casually. Especially women, so some of you ae definetly hanging out in the wrong places and with the wrong women. Having decided to stretch my wings a bit in the past year, my perception is that yes, there are a lot of people who take sex very casually not only in the DR, but in the US as well, which is what caused me to wonder about it. How can you "lay on a kingsized bed and wait fo a total stranger to get there?" How can anyone wake up next to someone they don't know? I am not judging this in any way. In fact, when I listen to friends brag about their exploits, I wonder if I am not missing out by sitting in the bleachers. The idea of separating the caring and love from sex just stumps me, though. It all sounds like pure mechanical acts. Perhaps I lack some key ingredient of detachment. It sounds like there must be a mixture of attraction and detachment to have casual sex. If there is such a thing, as Robert says. And yes, I don't have to do anything I don't want to, which is the policy I have so far followed, Judy.
By the way, Nathan, We are in similar spots, I am still married (legaly anyway) and being faced with the single scene after many years of mariage is not a piece of cake. Get lots of info and check out the clubs, etc. before taking action. By the way, I am a libra as well and we seem to be total opposites, so don't go by that.
Thanks for the info, guys. It's been food for thought.
Amber

[Pib]

Well andy a, I don't think Rob was speaking "for" anyone. Maybe he also is entitled to an opinion.

How exactly "many women" having children from different men has to do ANYTHING with casual sex. Not connecting. Besides, are Dominican women the only ones having children from different men? Generalizations are offensive, so since I, as a Dominican, am entitled to be offended I, as the offended party, told you what I think.

I am not judging "casual sex", whatever that is, inmoral. To each their own, but I resent the implications of your post. If it was meant as satire... Satire implies a certain level of humor that I fail to find in your post. Maybe you should try and polish your satire act and quit it for the time being. You are coming across as bigoted and ignorant. And that is my opinion.

[Chirimoya]

This topic comes up all the time in these forums and will continue to do so as long as men and women exist on this earth.

For me, of all the men on the board Jim Hinsch has made the most insightful observations about this in the threads I have read and/or participated in. Worth looking up.

Chiri

[Robert]

Originally posted by andy a
Am I missing something?

Hehehehe, calm down.

You said: "casual sex is the only kind that Dominicanas do"
ALL Dominicanas are not the same.

So, in my opinion, that's not true.

Also...

I said: "andy a" you have made some great posts"
Come on, that's gotta be worth some brownie points?

I agree with Chirimoya, Jim has made some very insightful posts on this subject that me and many others can learn something from.

Robert, spreading the love like cow manure on a cabbage field...

[Amber]

No one speaks for me unless they want to get clobbered. If something offends me or bothers me, I tell the person myself, with lots of graphics.
But let's get a grip here about generalizing the conduct of a culture. I do not agree with what some people do, but I respect their right to do as they please.
I think Ana is right about women having a stronger nesting instict than men, not to say that there are exceptions to that as well. some women have been known to throw their newborn offspring into garbage dumps in NYC as well as here. Some men have no idea how many kids they have spread out. These aren't things that happen just in the DR or US. Neither is casual sex a local idea. I just get the impression that in the past 15 years or so, what was once the exception is becoming the norm. So how do us old fosils deal with it?
By the way, I'll look up that article that Jim wrote. Thanks

[Pib]

Originally posted by Amber
If something offends me or bothers me, I tell the person myself, with lots of graphics.

Bwahaha. That was very funny. If I could have a sig line I'd use that one.


Rob, can I have a sig line. Please, pretty please?

[Robert]

Pib - No.