Successful Relationships!! Dominican Style! - Page 2

jdore · #11 01-16-2004, 04:14 PM

To All,

After hearing for so many years that relationships with Dominicans do not work...for whatever reasons, I am happy to say that I have been married to one of the best Dominicanas in the world. We have just celebrated our 17th wedding aniversary and just put our first of seven kids into university. She is the most amazing woman I have ever met...I am in the miliatry, and I can guarentee you that I have met plenty of wonderful women the world over. If she is able to put up with all of the military mumbo jumbo and continual departures from home, she must be one of the most relaxed Dominicans I have ever met. She will always remain numero uno en mi corazon.

Jon

papillon · #12 02-11-2004, 01:53 PM

To all those having relationships with Dominicans, I say have faith and love will prevail. We will be celebrating our 35th anniversary in August. My case is a little different than most, I am Dominican and my wife is American. We met while we were going to college in Michigan. We got married after I finished my Masters and moved to the DR. We both taught in Santo Domingo, my wife at Carol Morgan and I at UNPHU. I also worked at the Central Bank. My wife got a real bad case of homesickness so we moved back to the States after eight years. We visit the DR at least once a year and are including the DR as one of our retirement options. My family is still in the DR and they come to visit us when they need to decompress from politics. Our son was born in the DR and our daughter in Michigan. They are both college grads and we also have a grandson. My wife teaches elementary school and I work for the state of Michigan.
We came from different backgrounds but with a little give and take we have built what I consider a solid relationship based on love and respect.

carolinet · #13 05-31-2004, 09:54 AM

Hi everyone,

It's so refreshing to hear all these great stories about people having good, stable relationships with Dominicans. I've only been married to my Dominican husband Rafael for a short time but we've been together for a number of years (we met in Ireland but I'll be moving to the DR early next year as we'd like to live there for a while and see how it goes. We always have the option of moving back to Ireland anyway.)
He's an absolutely wonderful guy and would do anything for me (as I would for him). I have a great relationship with his family and friends (I'm fluent in Spanish, which helps) and I love being involved in real Dominican life when I go over instead of being couped up in 'todo incluidos' (even if it does mean dealing with the odd 'apagón'). There's nothing I love more than going to dance bachata and enjoy a fría on a Saturday night and I have very fond memories of all the times we went out to dinner with his extended family.
And, just for the record, not all Dominicans are on constantly on the make. My husband's mother is always bringing me shopping and buying me little presents like shoes, tops etc. and it's as common for them to treat me to dinner as for me to treat them.
I think that some of the people in this forum get a somewhat warped view of the country by living only in the densely foreigner-populated areas of the DR, thereby encountering many of the kinds of Dominicans who gravitate towards these areas to make a quick buck. I've found that ordinary Dominicans from other areas (my husband is from Azua) do not have this kind of mentality.
Anyway, to all those involved in successful realtionships with Dominicanos/as, pa'lante, and enjoy all that cariño caribeño!

Dessie · #14 07-08-2004, 12:58 PM

I can identify with what many have gone through with people telling them that their relationship with a Dominican can never work out. I am a pale white woman from an italian family and my fiance is Domincan. We have been together for almost two years now and although rocky at first we have survived the hard first year and are happier now than either of us thought possible.

I met my fiance about 3 1/2 years ago when I was married to an english man (who by the way was exactly what people told me my fiance would turn out to be...con-man, womanizer, thief, user, abuser, etc.) and we turned into quick friends (I know I know men and women can't be JUST friends). But either way we were very quick close friends. He was in a long term relationship with another latin woman (forgive me I can't remember if she was Puerto Rican or Portugese) who made him absolutely miserable. In the start we became friends in an attempt to find solace in each other to complain and feel less isolated in our relationships. My ex husband stole from me all the time from our joint bank account, cheated on me constantly and forced me at all costs to break off friendships that gave me any support to leave him. (Yeah I know "why did you let it happen for so long?" don't ask) Eventually I decided to file for divorce and didn't mention anything to my now fiance since I thought we are friends and nothing more (don't get me wrong I always thought he was a hottie) besides he was involved in a relationship and as a fellow female I respected the boundaries of our friendship.
I guess it was about three months after I filed for divorce that my fiance called me and told me it was over with him and his live in girlfriend. It was saddening to hear him so depressed. I stayed in closer contact with him and let him know a few weeks after his ex moved out that I had filed for divorce months back and that we would be divorced by March 2003.

Immediately he was so happy to hear this that he asked me to come for a visit in NY (I was living in NJ at the time). I agreed and we met for a quick dinner and a movie at his apartment. He had no furniture at that time since his ex took all of it with her but we curled up on the floor together bundled in a comforter and we watch a horrible comedy that we just about threw out the window. Numerous times he left the room and would come back with little things like snacks, drinks, etc. I missed work the next day because we stayed up all night and talked about our lives, likes, dislikes, our families and our friendship. That was when we looked each other in the face and realized that our friendship had a possibility of working as a relationship.

We gave it a shot (nothing to lose right?) and within months I was moving my own home up to NYC to live in his apartment. He bought new furniture and built me a walk in closet for my clothes, rearranged his life to fit me in. Only after I moved in did we fight back and forth (but I am a horrible roommate) but even those days passed quickly.

He has three wonderful children and 18 year old daughter (who he rarely gets the chance to see since she is "too old" to be babied), a 15 year old daughter and a 12 year old son, both of which I love as if they are my own. I never wanted to get involved with a man that had children or a past of broken hearts. He is both and his life has made him the person he is today. A successful self employed father of three and love of my life. I can't tell any of you how many times I look at his face and wonder "how did this happen?" I waited 27 years of my life (obviously not when I was a baby but still) to meet the man I am with now. I have found what it is that I was seaching for in this man. He makes me smile inside and out when I think of him or hear his voice or even see his number show up on my cell phone in the middle of the day. I have never felt so treasured by anyone else in my life and I thank god everyday for being kind enough to bring us together.

Ok that was way too long....

Dessie

MrMike · #15 10-12-2004, 08:50 PM

Celebrating my second anniversary with my Dominican wife on Thursday, we only threaten to kill each other every 90 days or so, down from weekly.

heldengebroed · #16 03-28-2005, 06:24 PM

3,5 years ago i was living with a young Belgian (9 years younger than me) when i met this Dominican woman 8 years older than me, with 2 kids the oldest 6 years younger than my ex. We met the 15th of august 2001 and the last monday of october i moved in with her and only a few days later i wrote, in a hotel in Milan, after a night out and being drunk as hell a letter which i keep in my safe declaring that i would marry her.

I'm convinced that she is a real "bruja" who put a spell on me. I left the young girl and, although i'm totaly against marriage, "forced" her to marry me. Since then i lost my job, because of my ex's gossip with my boss, and we had some rough financial times but if i had to do it all over knowing what i know now. I WOULDN'T HESITATE A SECOND. I love my wife with all my hart she's the best thing that happend to me

Greetings

Johan

SalsaBlondie · #17 04-12-2005, 03:49 PM

I married my Dominican and we are super happy, he is everything i never met all together in other guys: HONEST, generous, caring, hard-working, and he actually has a heart. Added bonus is that he can dance bachata like nobody's business! In a few short months here he learned english well enough to get a job, in his own career and helps me around the house. and, he cooks great moro con guandules, pollo guisado, fritos,... I am a lucky girl!

fernandodiaz · #18 06-29-2005, 06:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lore

A workmate of mine had a daughter (early-20's I know prime picking age!!) and she came on her grad trip and met an animacion guy (against everything in my books too!!, BUT)she hooked up with one of them and she came back at least 7/8 times in 3 yrs.They got married in the DR, she hired the best (I'm sure most expensive) lawyers to get him here.He arrived 4 yrs ago.Like I said, they were both young when this happened and the odds should have been against them. However, it has been four years.He has a respectable job(more than min wage at least)and they have just had their first newborn.They are as happy as the first day I saw them.By the way, I saw them together in the DR before any of this got started and remember he was "animacion". Now I'm certainly not saying that this is the norm, contrary, I think it is exceptional, however it can happen!! I know both people and they truly were in love together and that same love still shows here today. Maybe this is one in a million MommC but it really does happen.They are not all 100% bad. I do know the majority are in it for the "quick fix" be it money, visa's, whatever. But this is one of the times it has worked. Not many - but at least one - so far!!

I went to live in Boca Chica for a while and worked in a kids club. I too met an animacion guy when I was in my early 20's and evryone thought it wouldn't work. We now live in England together, have been married 4 years and are expecting our second child in 6 weeks - so yes, it can work out after all and how nice it is when it does.
Dawn Diaz xxx

Cabeson · #19 07-26-2005, 07:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rafael

I don't know of any cases with gringas married to Dominicanos, well I know one, but he has used and abused her and treats her like crap. She was definitely his ticket to the states and he has bailed many times and has tons of girls on the side.

I am a Dominican married to a gringa from NOrthern California. We are happily married. Have two beautiful dominicanos. And we bough a house one hour outside of L.A. It can happen.

I will say this, I went to a small private college and dated a lot before I met my wife. I knew dominicans that I was attracted to in NYC, but being away in college there were none that I liked at the private college. I initially thought I would marry a dominicana, but I found my true love from Northern California.

[IMG]C:\Documents and Settings\Ed and Jenn\My Documents\kidpics!!\MVC-022S.JPG[/IMG] [IMG]C:\Documents and Settings\Ed and Jenn\My Documents\kidpics!!\MVC-020S.JPG[/IMG]

jaguarbob · #20 07-27-2005, 11:03 AM

I am a white,male from US.Have been married for over seven years to a beautiful dominicana.Met her at the place I was renting,she was the maid there.We dated for over 1 year and some,she became pregnant,so we married.We had been planning to marry anyways,so it was mutual.She had a daughter at the time,we now have 2 daughters,and she is pregnant again,she desperatly wants a boy,,due in December.My oldest girl is 12,the youngest is 7.We have honestly not had any major problems,and I think it has to do with me living in her enviroment.My wife loves me dearly,tells me all the time,I respond the same,and her daughter also loves me and expresses it to me always.She had a house,a dominican house,as she is considered the dominican poor.I moved in with her....in an enclave of 8 other houses,all brothers,sisters and father.I have to say one thing,these people are just amazing,fantastic and the happiest people you will ever know.Even without anything,they never complain,never are outwardly unhappy,and always have treated me with great love,as I am a member of the family.I have not had any problem living in this enviroment,and actually have been very happy.We recently have had water run into the enclave,with a little prodding from me thru the town....so now we do not have to do the laundry,wash the pots and pans and bath in the river that runs thru the property.We are getting there...
Just a few words for those persons who get caught up in the sanki/money grubbers...there are plenty of great,great dominicans that do not fall into that catagory....I live in the Samana peninsula,so plenty of tourists here,so I can relate to those who do vacation here and get caught in that trap.Bottom line for me is the Dominican is a very wonderful person,just great people,and makes a good wife/husband.
For you who like to crunch numbers,I just turned 69 and my wife just turned 31...and still am much in love,and who knows,if it is another girl,we may try again...!!!!!Life is great.
bob