Age difference in relationships

[amigomexicano]

Do younger Dominican women (18-22 years old) have a problem with dating 30-35 year old men?? I'm talking about serious relationships not the prostitute/customer type of relationship.

Can Dominican women in that age range (18-22) actually feel attracted to men between 30-35 years old? I have been in countries where this actually happens and not because of money but because women at that age value experience in older men.

Say, I'm 33, will Dominican society look down at me if I try to meet 18 or 19 year old girls for a relationship??

I never understood why some societies consider age to be such an important factor in relationships. I never understood why American society would never accept that a 30-something guy dates a 20 year old girl. I mean, in my experience, men become better persons as they get older, not to mention they have more resources to become providers.

According to some studies, women look for 4 things in men:
1) Physical strength
2) Status
3) Resources (includes intelligence, education and money)
4) Being emotionally caring

Men between 30 and 40 years old (or even older) usually have more of these features than men 18-22 years old so why do many societies discriminate against a 10-15 year age difference between partners??

I have the impression that a North American 20 year old woman can actually have a desire to date older men but she has been programmed by society to reject this type of relationship.

Latin culture in general has less prejudice against these relationships but it varies a lot between countries. My country (Mexico) has become nearly as intolerant as the US in this respect but I have been to other countries where they are less prejudiced or they actually find it more positive. How is the DR in this aspect??

[Mirador]

...

Cuando el amor llega así de esta manera,
uno no se da ni cuenta,
el carutal reverdece y guamachito florece
y la soga se revienta.

Cuando el amor llega así de esta manera
uno no tiene la culpa,
quererse no tiene horario ni fecha en el calendario
cuando las ganas se juntan.

...


Music and Lyrics by Simon Diaz

[qgrande]

Originally Posted by amigomexicano

Do younger Dominican women (18-22 years old) have a problem with dating 30-35 year old men??
I have the impression that a North American 20 year old woman can actually have a desire to date older men but she has been programmed by society to reject this type of relationship.

Mirador's answer is much better,
But maybe you should try doing a better job at convincing those 20 year old girls they have been programmed by society and should actually fall in love with you.... Maybe you can show them the studies....
I wonder whether you also have the impression 20 year old guys have been 'programmed by society to reject' 40 year old women...
But, well, with a 30-35 / 18-20 relatonship you will certainly not stand out in the Dominican Republic. Do you alreadly have a girl in mind or are you just planning?

[amigomexicano]

Originally Posted by qgrande

Mirador's answer is much better,
But maybe you should try doing a better job at convincing those 20 year old girls they have been programmed by society and should actually fall in love with you.... Maybe you can show them the studies....
I wonder whether you also have the impression 20 year old guys have been 'programmed by society to reject' 40 year old women...
But, well, with a 30-35 / 18-20 relatonship you will certainly not stand out in the Dominican Republic. Do you alreadly have a girl in mind or are you just planning?

Thanks for your comment. I am not interested in convincing American or Mexican women that they should fall in love with me. There is no way a single man can change a prejudiced society. Just look at all the racial/ethnic discrimination that still goes on in the US and other countries and hasn't been changed by centuries of civil rights struggle and blah, blah. I have no interest in changing society's aberrations. There are certainly many countries where these aberrations are less present and I would like to live in one of them. The USA and Mexico are not on this list and I probably will never marry an American or a Mexican since women from these countries tend to be materialistic, obsessed with status and less feminine. Also, I prefer women that are at least 10 years younger than me simply because they look more attractive to me than women in their 30's. Beauty and youth are very important to a man. Just look at all the foreign men that go to the DR. They don't go there looking for 50 year old women, do they?? They usually go for the young women. I don't believe 20 year old men have been programmed by SOCIETY to reject 40 year old women. I think they have been programmed by NATURE to prefer youth. Nature wants men to look for fertility and energy in a woman while women are programmed by nature to look for the four aspects I mentioned earlier though society has imposed a new requirement: small age gap. I don't have a girl in mind now, I'm just planning to meet someone special in the near future to start a family and raise my kids in a country where there is less discrimination on the basis of race and age.

[Rocky]

A lot of Dominican women will have nothing to do with boys their age, as they want an older man who will treat them right and appreciate them.
Young men are usually abusive, around here.

[laurapasinifan]

Originally Posted by amigomexicano

I'm just planning to meet someone special in the near future to start a family and raise my kids in a country where there is less discrimination on the basis of race and age.

that being the last statement of your post, Id say you got your priorities all mess up. Even if you are minority in the US for example, youd have a better life dealing with the "DISCRIMINATION"...if you can call it that in the us than deaing with some of the other quality of life issues you have to attend to , by moving to another country, especially the DR.

It is not like I am saying people cant come here on make a great life, but few do it on a whim . they have a plan and they have an edge, a niche to get a good foothold .

Id like to know exactly wher eyou live now that is SOOOOOO bad for race and age discrimination.....heck I know several men who have married foriegn women half their age from countries like India, japan, vietnam, and the DR. I am sure there are many more countries where women are sought out , because they have a view of their role in amrried life that is very attractive to men who have dealt with women who think they have so much owed them.... and have realized it as well.

in many countries a woman 20 years old is more mature than most 28 year old women in america.

my daughter is the same age as my GF, and as much as I love her she seems like she is 12 compared to my gf. Maybe because she was spoiled some, maybe because here they just get so much given to them and see others that have so much. I wont send my daughter to college till she grows up! and i think she has at least 3 more years to go...and she is in her 20's.


know there are plenty of guys who seek someone young on purpose. then there are guys who just let the chips fall where they may.......I almost starting dating a woman that was at least in her late 50's...( much older than me..thank you) If you put up all these conditions and restrictions, you are making an artificial choice.........just like who ever you want, and be happy if they like you back. and tell everyone else to pound sand

bob

[AZB]

It happens all the time. Believe me, you are considered very young in Dominican Republic. Come here and find your 20 yr old girl. There are plenty and you are in your prime age to attract them. I am 43 and I can date girls that age and can even get married. I am not talking about some poor girl from resort area slumbs. My advice would be to find a girl who studies in a university and lives with a full family in a decent sized house in a nice area. Santiago area is the prefered location to look for your mate. You should be looking into a middle class family. Just try to act more latino and less gringo. This means, look around you and see how people are dressed in the upper middle class circle and dress and act exactly the same. Ex: no shorts, no hawaiian shirts, no smoking, no sneakers and do not be a loud ugly american like we know someone in sosua. Keep a low profile and respect the people around you. You will do just fine. The majority of the tourist / expats only deal with the poorest people on this island and support their whole family, then complain.
AZB

[MaineGirl]

When I was fifteen and living in Venezuela, all of my schoolmates had boyfriends in their 30's. It's like a sugardaddy in some ways and in other ways it just means he has a car, a job--he can provide a good relationship. Now in other cases, my schoolmates had to hide the relationship but they did it anyway!

Personally there are 12 years between me and my partner and it works fine.

[mrmagic]

with all due respect what a load of crap (programmed by nature and all blag blah). Men eat whats on the plate. if lamb is unavailable, then they will eat mutton...its a sliding scale.
With respect to long term relationships. Women go for security first which means MONEY. I mean just go to the DR and look around...some of the hottest women youve ever seen with tired RICH old men. where do you see that around the world. Where i come from hot women and men go for hot women and men.

in the DR Women do what they have to do for themselves and the child theyve already had by another man...get the picture! But i prefer these women here compared with the women from other countries....each to his own! you'll find your dream friend...just get a prenup' as per my lawyers advice.

Originally Posted by amigomexicano

Thanks for your comment. I am not interested in convincing American or Mexican women that they should fall in love with me. There is no way a single man can change a prejudiced society. Just look at all the racial/ethnic discrimination that still goes on in the US and other countries and hasn't been changed by centuries of civil rights struggle and blah, blah. I have no interest in changing society's aberrations. There are certainly many countries where these aberrations are less present and I would like to live in one of them. The USA and Mexico are not on this list and I probably will never marry an American or a Mexican since women from these countries tend to be materialistic, obsessed with status and less feminine. Also, I prefer women that are at least 10 years younger than me simply because they look more attractive to me than women in their 30's. Beauty and youth are very important to a man. Just look at all the foreign men that go to the DR. They don't go there looking for 50 year old women, do they?? They usually go for the young women. I don't believe 20 year old men have been programmed by SOCIETY to reject 40 year old women. I think they have been programmed by NATURE to prefer youth. Nature wants men to look for fertility and energy in a woman while women are programmed by nature to look for the four aspects I mentioned earlier though society has imposed a new requirement: small age gap. I don't have a girl in mind now, I'm just planning to meet someone special in the near future to start a family and raise my kids in a country where there is less discrimination on the basis of race and age.

[sevenup]

In most marriages, age gap has been a real problem because opinions do not match, there is lack of communication and understanding and most of the times, the likes are the dislikes of either partner and vice-versa. Married since 3 years, I am getting divorced because my wife is 10 years older than me, and we do not share a peaceful life.