What dominican men expect from thier girlfriends

[mountainfrog]

Originally Posted by AnnaC

I'm not getting that. Please explain.

Tranquila.
Just let it sink in...

m'frog

[Onions&carrots]

Originally Posted by Avrora

Thanks! I am too scared to ask him, he is so angry at me

By and large, we are possessive, jealous and controlling. A wife/ gf is like a child to us. We treat them with the same care and love we would treat our daughter.

If you try to assert yourself i.e. independence, liberated attitude, we frown on that type of behaviour. That spells the beginning of the end. If such modus operandi is continued, it's the death knell for the relationship.

The woman's input is extremely important. It's up to her to make the DR male feel loved, cared for or rejected. We Dominicans expect that the woman will take care of us as if we were helpless, defenseless babies.

If you don't display this behavior, he will take it you are apathetic and uncaring. YOU MUST SHOW WHAT YOU FEEL INSIDE. This isn't a cold scandinavian country where you hide your feelings. This isn't a rigid anglo saxon culture circa 17th century colonial America where expression is forbidden.

DR men are used to women showing their love via meals. Extremely important to DR culture is when a woman invites a man to a home cooked meal. Not a liberated gringa inviting a male to a restaurant. Man there's no bigger turn-off. Remember this is your boyfriend, not a business meeting to discuss budgeting and expenditures or the most cost effective fashion to import salmon.

You must do the cooking. That shows personal care, attention. DR men inside need to continue that maternal affection via the wife. Their male strength is accentuated by such behaviour.

[azabache]

Nice post......very accurate.

[Alyonka]

Originally Posted by miguel

WALK AWAY. BETTER YET, RUNNNNNNN AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!.

First of all, let me talk to you not as a Dominican but as a man.

The moment SOME guys see that a woman is changing her life to accomodate ours and if the guy is an axx-hole, he WILL take you for granted, he WILL think less of you and he will put in his heads that he can mop the floor with you.

Look at it this you, you accomodate him, he WILL control you. Trust me.

It seems that you are a little afraid of this guy and his anger(temper) so why waste your time since it will probably get worse.

I have said the following a whole bunch of times here and now I will tell it to you, just keep in mind that I formed this opinion from episodes that I have seen with my own eyes:

MOST Dominican males that I know (NOTE: I), DO feel that even after they split with someone, that they still have some type of "rights" with that person.

I have seen ex-husbands, after being divorced to a number of years, still go to the ex-wife's home and still try to order her around. SOME even threaten them telling them "if you marry or I see you with someone, I will kill you, you will always be mine".

I have seen ex-boyfriends make sure to show up at an ex-girlfriend's house just to see if she is dating someone else. If she is, he would start problems with her and the new guy.

And what's worse is that even if you are not together, not only do they think that they still own you, but they also expect you to be available for them when they want sex. NOT ALL.

Let me ask you something:

Since he has some anger and you can't talk to him(and that tells me tht you are a little afraid of him), what will happen when he slaps you around?. Are you going to accomodate that too?.

If the answer is "NO", then there goes the answer to all your questions. Therefore, cut your loses and don't look back.

Good luck. You will need it if you decide to give him another try.

Btw, there are a whole bunch of guys, out there, that will accept you JUST THE WAY YOU ARE, without you having to change one once. You just need to look for them in the right places.

Thanks! I agree. I like to be accepted for who i am and I think I deserve it since I accept people for who they are with all their mistakes.

[Alyonka]

Originally Posted by Onions&carrots

By and large, we are possessive, jealous and controlling. A wife/ gf is like a child to us. We treat them with the same care and love we would treat our daughter.

If you try to assert yourself i.e. independence, liberated attitude, we frown on that type of behaviour. That spells the beginning of the end. If such modus operandi is continued, it's the death knell for the relationship.

The woman's input is extremely important. It's up to her to make the DR male feel loved, cared for or rejected. We Dominicans expect that the woman will take care of us as if we were helpless, defenseless babies.

If you don't display this behavior, he will take it you are apathetic and uncaring. YOU MUST SHOW WHAT YOU FEEL INSIDE. This isn't a cold scandinavian country where you hide your feelings. This isn't a rigid anglo saxon culture circa 17th century colonial America where expression is forbidden.

DR men are used to women showing their love via meals. Extremely important to DR culture is when a woman invites a man to a home cooked meal. Not a liberated gringa inviting a male to a restaurant. Man there's no bigger turn-off. Remember this is your boyfriend, not a business meeting to discuss budgeting and expenditures or the most cost effective fashion to import salmon.

You must do the cooking. That shows personal care, attention. DR men inside need to continue that maternal affection via the wife. Their male strength is accentuated by such behaviour.

I like that myself. I am from Eastern Europe and am used to this sort of thing.

[mountainfrog]

Originally Posted by Avrora

.... I am from Eastern Europe and am used to this sort of thing.

I think, you are referring to the love and cooking relation, aren't you?

I've always wondered why Slavic women get along with Dominican men so well. Thanks for the enlightenment.

BTW, isn't it time to form a Slavic Language User Team Section?
La Barbie as moderator?

m'frog

[Angel_04]

HAAHAHAAHAHAH!!!! sorry.. but that was damn funny!

Labarbie would be a no nonsense moderator... haha.. give her a chance.. shes will tell everyone off and give herself "warnings"..

[bellissima_81]

Originally Posted by Avrora

Thanks! I am too scared to ask him, he is so angry at me

U should never be scared when u show the other person ure scared of them they take it as an avantage they have on u. I used to be afraid to show my feelings especially when i was mad, but i can say that one good thing that the last person ive dated wich was dominican showed me to express it even when i was mad at him i would yell back and i wouldnt be scared, he actually helped me get stronger. My mom (wich is italian and has a very loud voice) always said to me if a men knows ure scared of him he will walk all over u , u have to stand up , head up and put ure foot down....

[la_barbie]

lol .... I'm all up for it !!! lol

For a guy like that, I'd kick his ass so hard, then hang him by his balls....

Women are so stupid when it comes to men, half of them don't know what to do, are confused, scared....... BE WITH YOURSELVES IF YOU'RE A IDIOT ... that's my motto

[Angel_04]

Originally Posted by la_barbie

For a guy like that, I'd kick his ass so hard, then hang him by his balls....

HAHAHA... hang him by his balls!? lol.. ouch! The visual I am getting here isn't good... eww... lol...

(my mom used to always say that if a man ever hit my sister or I....she would do just that--hang him by his balls!)... lovely!