Why some NA women think they can change their DR man?

[contasm]

We have heard many stories of innocent, young American and Canadian woman falling in love with resort workers. Sponsoring them, marrying them to finally take them out of DR into new territory and to find out later on that these very same men are not the same guys they met while holidaying in POP, SDQ etc….

- Juan Manuel sleeps in till 3:00 pm and it’s not motivated to get out and find a job.

- Johnny spends most weekends @ Babalus dancing the night away with a woman he says is her second cousin (Yeah…sure)

- Wilmer disappeared for a weekend to finally show up on Monday telling me that he was looking for a job in Niagara Falls (Ontario Canada)

- Carlos wants us to send $ 300.00 a month to his family in Puerto Plata

These are real cases of real women (not real guy names) living in Toronto. All these ladies told me that they suspected that some of these things might happen, but they always thought that these guys would be eager to start a new productive life, in a new country.

Suurprise !!!! hmmm… may be not. Deep inside, these ladies knew what might have been ahead and confessed to me that they thought they could convert a DR man into a pseudo “American/Canadian” man. The experiment proved fatal. As a disclaimer, I should point out that I also know some couples that are happily married/together but unfortunately this group is not the majority.

My question to the ladies (and any man who might want to venture into answering) is.

How hard is to change a DR man once he sets foot in USA/CANADA?
Is it possible re-educate a DR man once he’s gone too far?


Thanks in advance for your comments.

Contasm

[windeguy]

North American women think they can change any man, origin notwithstanding. I don't like to generalize, but this has been my personal experience enough times to understand this generality. They don't realize that change isn't likely for anyone past the age of 12, So these women are the ones that have to live and learn the hard way.

I quickly realized that I could never change a woman, I wonder why women cannot come to this realization about men.

[Malibook]

- Julio left me for a young slim chica and now I have to pay the government back for the welfare he collects for the next 3 years.

[mountainfrog]

Originally Posted by contasm

...How hard is to change a DR man once he sets foot in USA/CANADA?

Why change him?

The sankie adorers find them to be 'cute, awsome, sexy, great, sweet, intelligent, etc.' and that's what they buy....

The question, therefore, is not how can he be changed but how can the victims live with the changes that will usually take place after their Dominican novios/husbands have reached the sofa in the promised land...

m'frog

[mountainfrog]

Originally Posted by Malibook

.... for the next 3 years.

Nothing wrong with that.
I am sure Julio was worth every dime and do the regular payments not revive those sweet memories again and again...

m'frog

[MommC]

I know Dominican men who has successful made the transition to Canadian life.
They have good English skills, good jobs,a nice home, wife, kids,girlfriends, cars, electronics,ex-wives,boy toys,party with the boys once a week,mistresses, all the beer they can drink......
Did they change....?? Sure they did ......but not as much as their wives would like to believe.
Remember you can take a Dominican out of the Dominican Republic but you can't take the Dominican Republic out of a Dominican!

Oh....before you fire away at me I also know Dominican women who have made the transition nicely....their husbands provide all the bells and whistles they need, plus they get to 'spirit' if not outright 'gift' money to those still in the DR, plus they 'visit' at least once every year sometimes for several months at a time!
They 'changed' too!

[shadInToronto]

Originally Posted by Malibook

- Julio left me for a young slim chica and now I have to pay the government back for the welfare he collects for the next 3 years.

Competition is good ... time for you to lose weight, fattie.

[shadInToronto]

Originally Posted by contasm

... How hard is to change a DR man once he sets foot in USA/CANADA?...

Change him into what? .... his expertise is in horizontal salsa. What are your expectations?

[contasm]

Originally Posted by MommC

I know Dominican men who has successful made the transition to Canadian life.
They have good English skills, good jobs,a nice home, wife, kids,girlfriends, cars, electronics,ex-wives,boy toys,party with the boys once a week,mistresses, all the beer they can drink......
Did they change....?? Sure they did ......but not as much as their wives would like to believe.
Remember you can take a Dominican out of the Dominican Republic but you can't take the Dominican Republic out of a Dominican!

Oh....before you fire away at me I also know Dominican women who have made the transition nicely....their husbands provide all the bells and whistles they need, plus they get to 'spirit' if not outright 'gift' money to those still in the DR, plus they 'visit' at least once every year sometimes for several months at a time!
They 'changed' too!

Hi MommC;

Out of curiosity;
Were these men you are referring to resort workers before leaving DR ?
How did they score regarding Hillbilly’s rules ?

Thanks
Contasm

[AnnaC]

Gee I guess no one is interested in having this discussion with you. I can't imagine why and I'll bet the above people mentioned whether it's real names or not are regretting having you told you anything.

But you and MommC can have a nice chat I'm sure.

BTW ladies Contasm I have now discovered is a man so if you've shared stories with him because you thought he was a woman I guess he's not.

I was always under the impression it was a woman because in earlier posts he was so interested in knowing about chocolate friends etc.