 |
|
|
|
|
If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above.
You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed.
To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.
|
08-26-2008, 04:34 PM
|
|
Bronze
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 16
(11)
|
|
What has a more negative effect on a relationship: difference in age or difference
in education? I am sorry, but I know very, very, very few Dominican men who are on par with me when it comes to education. I know many people are not as fortunate as me and couldn't go to college, but they still have that desire to learn new things and be informed. Even if everyone says that May-December and January-May relationships are doomed to fail, I would say that they would have more success than relationships where education levels aren't similar. My sister who has dated more Dominican guys than me feels the same way to. They weren't as educated as her and she always ended up dumping them. I don't know, perhaps we haven't come across the right guys.
|
08-26-2008, 07:19 PM
|
|
Gold
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 1,242
(82)
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lasata
in education? I am sorry, but I know very, very, very few Dominican men who are on par with me when it comes to education. I know many people are not as fortunate as me and couldn't go to college, but they still have that desire to learn new things and be informed. Even if everyone says that May-December and January-May relationships are doomed to fail, I would say that they would have more success than relationships where education levels aren't similar. My sister who has dated more Dominican guys than me feels the same way to. They weren't as educated as her and she always ended up dumping them. I don't know, perhaps we haven't come across the right guys.
|
I hate to sound negative, but when it comes to Dominicans dating foreigners I think it has less to do with the difference in age or education, than it has with looks and submissiveness or bank account!
|
08-26-2008, 08:49 PM
|
|
Gold
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 1,860
(60)
|
|
I'm a gringo married to a Dominicana that has two university degree plus post grad in the DR and a college degree in Canada and owns a sucessful business. I have a two technical degree but don't have nearly the formal education as my spouse. Having said that I think that we are of close to equal intellect and my general knowledge of the world far exceeds her's. More important than having equal education is having a shared vision of the future and caring enough for each other and the relationship to do the necessary things to have the relationship grow. This is easier if you are of a common culture but perhaps the reason your sister and perhaps yourself don't have sucessful relationships with Dominican men is that you are more Americanized than them. I don't mean this in a negative way.
|
08-26-2008, 09:30 PM
|
|
Silver
|
|
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 338
(100)
|
|
I think there is a difference between education levels and intellect levels. I am well educated whereas my husband is not, however he is far more intelligent than i am. He learns things very quickly whereas i do not. Either way i don't think this has much bearing on a successful relationship, In my experience if you both have the same vision for the future and can relate to one another's beliefs and views, you don't have to agree but respect them!
Ignore the education and go with gut instinct, chemistry, humour and passion...far more exciting!  |
08-26-2008, 11:25 PM
|
|
Bronze
|
|
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 91
(28)
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lasata
in education? I am sorry, but I know very, very, very few Dominican men who are on par with me when it comes to education. I know many people are not as fortunate as me and couldn't go to college, but they still have that desire to learn new things and be informed. Even if everyone says that May-December and January-May relationships are doomed to fail, I would say that they would have more success than relationships where education levels aren't similar. My sister who has dated more Dominican guys than me feels the same way to. They weren't as educated as her and she always ended up dumping them. I don't know, perhaps we haven't come across the right guys.
|
The age or education difference has nothing to do with the negative effect on a relationship. It's the cultural difference that has the most negative effect.
Most women in latin american countries are second class citizens. So they grow up thinking of themselves as a sexual commodity and nothing more.
The latin men are brought up to think they are the king of the castle and the women in their lives are to look after and cater to their needs. This is a generalization but the majority of time this is a cultural difference that has the greatest effect on mixed culture relationships.
|
08-27-2008, 11:17 AM
|
|
Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,136
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by laurajane
Ignore the education and go with gut instinct, chemistry, humour and passion...far more exciting! |
With all due respect this type of advice has been the recipe for many a disaster that we've read about here on DR1.
Please don't think I'm bashing you, I'm not. But its' thinking like this that has gotten many people in trouble. If it has worked for you to this point consider yourself lucky, but to advise another person to overlook someones' education when considering that person as a life partner is irresponsible and wreckless.
Its' one thing to marry someone beneath you in status when you live in the DR, as they would be more comfortable settling into a traditional role.
But in the US/Canada?
How is any male or female dominican, illiterate in two languages, going to function in a new country?
And how much strain is that going to put on the relationship, when after the sun and beer are gone, you are left with an overgrown child who you have to do everything for?
Last edited by AnnaC; 08-27-2008 at 05:59 PM.
|
08-27-2008, 11:32 AM
|
|
Gold
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 1,648
(25)
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Berzin
And how much strain is that going to put on the relationship, when after the sun and beer are gone, you are left with an overgrown child who you have to everything for?
|
Oh so true.
|
08-27-2008, 12:17 PM
|
|
Silver
|
|
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 153
(17)
|
|
You need to ignore all the fears and start dating. That’s the only way you’re going to find out.
Education or age different has nothing to do with love unless you make it an issue. You can’t choose who you fall in love with. It’s something that happens naturally.
Listen to yourself and you will find the answer. It’s okay to make mistake. You live and learn from your mistake.
|
08-27-2008, 12:52 PM
|
|
Gold
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,628
(57)
|
|
so true.....
|
08-27-2008, 01:10 PM
|
|
Moderator
|
|
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 2,136
|
|
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bayx-**
You need to ignore all the fears and start dating. That’s the only way you’re going to find out.
Education or age different has nothing to do with love unless you make it an issue. You can’t choose who you fall in love with. It’s something that happens naturally.
Listen to yourself and you will find the answer. It’s okay to make mistake. You live and learn from your mistake.
|
Certainly its' OK to make a mistake. But doing something foolish when there are better ways to go about doing them is quite in another category.
I am at a loss at the type of advice being thrown around here. Its' as if no one ever learns anything from what gets posted.
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is On
|
|
|
|
|
|
