How can a woman stick to one man in the DR?

[dulce]

I feel like playing devil's advocate today so here goes:
With so many handsome Dominican men how can a woman choose just one to settle down with?
I think there are many women who play the same game as the men as far as having a number of lovers in the DR. The difference is that the women keep it more of a secret because they are looked at differently than if it was a man doing the same thing.
There are a lot more SKings out there than we know but....shhhhhhhhhh
I predict that this post will bring out the beast in the male players.

PS disclaimer: This post may or may not be about me personally but I do know women who have successfully juggled "mucho amantes". The men pretended to believe the lies and always returned for more without demanding she stopped seeing other men.

[sammystorm19]

I totally agree with you on this one. I know a few friends that have had played the same game as the guys do. They never got caught and finally realized that they needed to stop the games. Their theory was, if guys can do it, why can't the girls.

Cheers
Erin

[Alyonka]

Well, as my father said - you are who you love. We have to choose wisely.

[yess]

I am not interested in multiple partners, got over that in my twenties. It was fun on some levels but ultimately unsatisfying. So I got married and that has lasted for twenty years. The marriage was successful and supportive but difficult. My spouse did stray once with much deceit and we worked through it. I never so much as looked at another man in 20 years.

Then I crashed into love with a man who happens to be Dominican. Unlike most men and apparently a lot of women, I told my husband about my feelings for this man from day one. Nothing was hidden. I remembered how much pain and confusion his lies had caused me and I refused to hurt and disrespect him in that way. My husband who has always had my support, loved me enough as a person and a friend to want my happiness and stepped aside.

Anyway . . . when I read this about cheating and playing games I say that if you believe so much in what you* are doing, that it is the right thing for you, why hide it?


ps: and the three of us are living happily ever after

* the general "you" not anyone specifically

[tlc32875]

Originally Posted by dulce

I feel like playing devil's advocate today so here goes:
With so many handsome Dominican men how can a woman choose just one to settle down with?
I think there are many women who play the same game as the men as far as having a number of lovers in the DR. The difference is that the women keep it more of a secret because they are looked at differently than if it was a man doing the same thing.
There are a lot more SKings out there than we know but....shhhhhhhhhh
I predict that this post will bring out the beast in the male players.

PS disclaimer: This post may or may not be about me personally but I do know women who have successfully juggled "mucho amantes". The men pretended to believe the lies and always returned for more without demanding she stopped seeing other men.

ya know as i was reading that other post about men..i was thinking the samething you were writing ...i agree with you 100%..why is it ok for men and not women ?

[tlc32875]

just to clarify ..i wasnt agreeing about the cheating part ..just the if men can date/hook up with a young sexy dominicana and its ok...why cant a woman date/hook up with a young sexy dominican man ???

[dulce]

I should have clarified too that I was married for 26 years and NEVER cheated on my husband.I can not say the same is true for him.
I do not agree with cheating on a "loved" one. What I was trying to say is that if Dominican men think their main woman is sitting around alone while he spends time with other women then the men are fooling themselves. Really if everyone was honest with themselves about what they know is happening on both sides they would be seen as immoral.
Also most men and women lie to themselves and tell themselves that they are the number one and the rest are only play things. In their mind this makes all the BS acceptable behavior in their minds.

[catcherintherye]

It cuts both ways. It is a matter of honesty and trust.

However, while I want and respect honesty, I would find it extremely difficult to put up with a three way (or more) relationship with any woman I really cared about.

Being honest about another involvement would, however, allow us to end our relationship as friends rather than enemies, which is an important consideration.

[SKing]

OK...the problem is (SOLELY IN MY OPINION) is that alot of women, actually most, cannot separate sex from emotions.
What most men do, I do not personally call "cheating" unless this man is emotionally "attached" to whomever he is seeing besides his Wife/Girlfriend. I would be more hurt and upset if my husband was emotionally attached to some other woman rather than it just being sex.
Most women, when they become sexually active with a man, begin to develop feelings for that man. Men can have sex without giving a sh*t.
Honestly, me....I love the thrill of the chase. I am what you would call a big tease. I have tons of interested suitors........non of which have acheived actual "bed" time. Why? Because I do not see any of them as being the "one". So OK, my Dominican thinks that I don't even LOOK at any other men. What good is it going to do to tell him? It doesn't make a difference.
I have an ex-novio (Dominican) from the US who is coming the end of February to visit his family in Santo Domingo. He is practically begging to see me. I am going to see him (and make him take me to the most expensive restaurant in Santiago)...but I'm definitely not telling you know who! I don't plan on sleeping with him but to men, even going out with someone else hurts their little ego. Men, especially Dominicans, are like children and must be treated as such. So women, do what you want...
SHALENA

[dulce]

Catcher, That's the key no man or woman should play around or allow playing if they truly love or care for each other.