18 year old Dominican Stepchild in the USA

[Alyonka]

Do you think he is going to appreciate the fact that you have supported him? Do you think he is going to be nicer to you or anyone else in return?

[AlterEgo]

Originally Posted by gringobachata7

the big problem is that his mother nags me all the time and the family in the DR in poverty call and harrass me to suport him and make him a permanent resident because the life in the DR is too hard for him and that it is damaging everything that we spent years building together.

Do NOT help him get permanent residency!!! Yikes!

[gringobachata7]

I honestly do not think it will make him better. I never met a person with the rotten heart that he is, it is very unique. WHen I met him, he was all skin and bones with no future or a father and I immediately began to support him but so far nothing has made him nicer to me. He loves and respects everyone but me!

[trina]

I hate to say this, but after reading the nightmare you've been put through, maybe a yola could take him back?

[pedrochemical]

He should join the army -

That'd learn 'im.

[frank recktenwald]

Originally Posted by gringobachata7

the big problem is that his mother nags me all the time and the family in the DR in poverty call and harrass me to suport him and make him a permanent resident because the life in the DR is too hard for him and that it is damaging everything that we spent years building together.

Have 3 stepchildren myself and when I moved here to also take care of them I told my wife as well as the kids that I'll take care of them till they're 18. If they show me that they're doing their best I'll support them if not it's the road. The oldest one is 15 and I must say they do their best.
My in laws I told them to f..k off, they respect me now, they might not like me but I don't give a damn I'm not here for a popularity contest.
I was also raised by a stepfather and I always respected him because he took better care of me than my biological father ever did.
My step kids are happy but they also have the common sense to respect what I'm doing for them.
Apparently your stepson nor your wife have that. Put your foot down otherwise you'll be in for a lot more trouble!!!!

[ccarabella]

Please, please not another parasite that will not contibute anythng positive to our society and will only become another statistic.

Send him back to where he came from ASAP for your sake and ours.

No wonder the family keeps nagging at you, good riddance, they're probably happy you took him away.

Send him to DR and pay for his therapy maybe one day he can become a productive individual. That will be YOUR contibution to society.

[GringoCArlos]

He's no longer your problem if he is 18, working and living somewhere else. If he has permission to work, fine, let him work. Let him learn how tough life can be, and how good he had it until he blew it with you. He can worry about his own passport and his own permanent residency if that's what he wants.

If he hates the US so much, he'll go back on his own. Also tell your wife that your home is off-limits to this creep. Would you do any different if he was your biological son? I wouldn't until he shaped up.

If your wife continues to nag on you, then lay it down with her too - turn off the spigot, or go live with her son, or go back to the DR, but you're not going to take it from her anymore either. Tell the in-laws to go to hell, and phooey to the idea of supporting this parasite if he goes back to the DR too.

Some people don't appreciate what they have until they lose it, and they won't appreciate "nice" - show them what hard-ass looks like, and let them make their choices.

[joseph2007]

Hes young and stupid i dont agree that shiping him off will solve the problem maybe in the short term but not the long term. You say yourself he was in a bad way when u met him .He sounds troubled to me maybe this has something to do with his biological father rejecting him maybe this is why he resents you and has problems accepting you as his father he is obviously crying out for help just not neccesarly doing it in the right way i think you need to work on breaking down boudarys.By shipping him back to DR you are actually contributing to his road of rejection and the situation will probably worsen.
Also as a mother myself i find a previous comment about the fact that you married your wife and not her son totally unacceptable when you married your wife you got a package and i would put NO man before my son EVER no matter how bad he was and it looks like your wife feels the same.
I know others will probably disagree with my comments but its just my take on it .

[TOOBER_SDQ]

Originally Posted by joseph2007

Hes young and stupid i dont agree that shiping him off will solve the problem maybe in the short term but not the long term. You say yourself he was in a bad way when u met him .He sounds troubled to me maybe this has something to do with his biological father rejecting him maybe this is why he resents you and has problems accepting you as his father he is obviously crying out for help just not neccesarly doing it in the right way i think you need to work on breaking down boudarys.By shipping him back to DR you are actually contributing to his road of rejection and the situation will probably worsen.
Also as a mother myself i find a previous comment about the fact that you married your wife and not her son totally unacceptable when you married your wife you got a package and i would put NO man before my son EVER no matter how bad he was and it looks like your wife feels the same.
I know others will probably disagree with my comments but its just my take on it .

I agree with you 100% as to your comments I have put in bold.