Is My Man For Real?

[BJP]

Thank you m'frog for the positive input, although I am still full of wonders. Sammy says I have a convinient long distance relationship and my boyfriend should do as he pleases when I am not with him. I made a commitment to this man Sammy and he says he is faithful to me and I am certainly faithful to him. I could not continue with him if he had another girlfriend

[caro]

you will propably not like what I tell you but is the reality here (not for all dominican )...here we go

you have 50 and he have 27 year , the second night you have slepping with him = he see a easy target

when you are here he try to do is best for the relation look like a loving one , show is life , his family because is his WORK , how he can do money or more money. and when you are there he can have a great time because you pay for everything and he know he can receive more money when you are back home.

now that he see that for the money is really easy and not anymore a problem he try to get the biggest prize : the visa !!!

so now if for you is only about have vacation with sex and no more and lose some money on him go for it if not stop everything right now .

hope that help

[mountainfrog]

Originally Posted by BJP

... he says he is faithful to me and I am certainly faithful to him.

That's good.
From this I get the notion that you deserve each other.

Originally Posted by BJP

...I could not continue with him if he had another girlfriend

Don't worry, I am almost sure that he does not have ONE girlfriend besides you.

mountainfrog

[mountainfrog]

Originally Posted by caro

... he have 27 year....

Please don't sow doubts into a loving heart.
I am certain, he does not have 27 victims annually....

mountainfrog

[miguel]

Originally Posted by BJP

I AM A 50 YEAR OLD AND HAVE BEEN DIVORCED FOR 4 YRS. i WENT TO THE DR LAST MARCH (16 MONTHS AGO) FOR VACATION. I HAD BEEN THERE BEFORE WITH MY DAUGHTER AND ENJOYED IT. i DID NOT GO FOR ROMANCE OR SEX. i MET A WAITER IN THE RESTAURANT AND WE WENT TO THE HOTEL DISCO THAT NIGHT AND THE NEXT NIGHT TO A CHEESY HOTEL AND HAD SEX AND THEN WENT TO A DISCO. LET ME SAY THE HOTEL WAS MY SUGGESTION. I AM DEFINITELY NOT THE TYPE THAT DOES THIS KIND OF THING. I HAVE BEEN BACK TO VISIT MY BOYFRIEND 9 TIMES SINCE THEN. I HAVE TO SAY THE RELATIONSHIP WAS ABOUT SEX FOR ME AT THE BEGINNING AND NOW I HAVE SINCERE FEELINGS FOR HIM. I HAVE SENT MONEY TO HIM OFTEN AND PAY FOR EVERYTHING WHEN I VISIT.I HAVE MET HIS ENTIRE FAMILY INCLUDING EX GIRLFRIENDS AND HIS 2 CHILDREN. HE NO LONGER WORKS AT THE RESORT BUT NOW DRIVES A MOTOCONCHO. HE HAS ASKED ME TO MARRY HIM MANY TIMES BUT I AM NOT ONE TO RUSH INTO THINGS. I HAD NO CONCERNS UNTIL I TALKED TO A FELLOW AIRLINE PASSENGER AND HE MENTIONED SANKY PANKY. I FEEL IN MY HEART THAT HE IS NOT A SANKY AND THAT OUR FEELINGS FOR EACH OTHER ARE MUTUAL. HE ALWAYS ANSWERS THE PHONE WHEN I CALL AND HE CALLS ME ABOUT ONCE A WEEK. THE ONLY THING THAT BOTHERS ME IS I CANNOT REACH HIM WHEN HE VISITS HIS MOTHER WHO LIVES FAR FROM A CITY IN A REMOTE AREA AND HAS NO ELECTRICITY AND HE HAS NO SIGNAL ON HIS CELL PHONE.
ANY COMMENTS?

ANAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

WHERE ARE YOU ANAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

PLEASE COME AND TAKE ME OUT OF MY MISERY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

LET MY LAST WORDS BE: "ADIOS MUNDO CRUEL".

Btw: of course you are "not one to rush into things", you just happened to bang the guy the next day, at your suggestion.

Come on grandma, are you for real?.

Does anybody smell a SOCKO?.

[BJP]

caro- I feel like throwing up. It is not all about sex for me now. I spend most of my time with him visiting family and being with his friends.Like I said I was the one that initiated sex in the first place. I have heard from everyone, friends and family that our age difference is a major thing. maybe I am fooling myself into believing that it doesn't matter.You say this is a reality in the DR, but not for all dominicans, Is it possible he is one of them.It seems like he is sincere and loving when I visit and not putting on a show. I do feel bad sometimes sending money, but I realize that he does not have much, so I am happy to help him. Now I feel like I should call him right now and end it all. I just can't bring myself to do it though.

[Ladybird]

Originally Posted by BJP

caro- I feel like throwing up. It is not all about sex for me now. I spend most of my time with him visiting family and being with his friends.Like I said I was the one that initiated sex in the first place. I have heard from everyone, friends and family that our age difference is a major thing. maybe I am fooling myself into believing that it doesn't matter.You say this is a reality in the DR, but not for all dominicans, Is it possible he is one of them.It seems like he is sincere and loving when I visit and not putting on a show. I do feel bad sometimes sending money, but I realize that he does not have much, so I am happy to help him. Now I feel like I should call him right now and end it all. I just can't bring myself to do it though.

Just enjoy it and stop worrying. For centuries old men have been doing this sort of thing with young girls and still do. Just control the purse strings and keep that little niggling doubt so the love control doesnt overcome your common financial sense. You can pm me if you want to

[samanasuenos]

Originally Posted by BJP

Thank you m'frog for the positive input, although I am still full of wonders. Sammy says I have a convinient long distance relationship and my boyfriend should do as he pleases when I am not with him. I made a commitment to this man Sammy and he says he is faithful to me and I am certainly faithful to him. I could not continue with him if he had another girlfriend

Dear BJP: I am not saying that he SHOULD do as he please, only that he does. You have to understand that he is from another culture. Out of sight, out of mind; heck - it is acceptable for a guy to have many women - when you are THERE AND living in the same house. Why would he do otherwise?

Listen, I am not saying it is bad and I am not saying it is good, I am just saying that IT IS.

The reason the age thing is not such a big deal is that it is over-shadowed by how many benefits and possible benefits you represent. This man is stuck on an island. The only way off is to swim with the sharks or try a flimsy raft to Puerto Rico.

Or he could marry a foreigner who would sponsor him for a visa to her home country.

That is it. End of possibilities. And this is so hard to be aware of at first as most of us assume all we need to travel is time off from work and funds for the ticket.

His world is so much more limited.


Another point I have noticed in these relationships, and one that has been explained to me by the men in question, and their pals/families, is that an older lady is PREFERED. Because she represents more possibilities than a poor back-packer with a tighter body.

It is not that love is blind for these guys, just that there is more in play than bodies, much more.

Whether he intended for you to be his ticket out of poverty, or not, you must be aware that it is a possibility. Everyone in his family is.

Good luck and I applaud you for throwing your dirty laundry out here where we devour it.

You will figure it out. Sooner or later. We just want to spare you the heartache of ignorance. --Sammy

[samanasuenos]

Oh, and there is no reason to end it all. Just keep doing what you have been doing, never sending more than you can part with. And don't bring up any of the heavy issues. Enjoy your vacations.

Just be straight with yourself. That is the essential thing here.

You are operating in another country with more and different limits as well as a lot of ways of being, ways of dating, ways of seeing - that are just beyod our guesses.

No need to judge anyone, not him, not yourself. Just keep your eyes open.

And enjoy!! --Sammyh

[whirleybird]

BJP If you felt so sure and happy with your relationship why did you post on here to get other people's views? Now you have them does it make you feel different? Why not just enjoy what you but just be cautious as already advised.