My story...Hope this can help!

[dmc1]

I am embarrassed to admit this and I am certain I will be ridiculed on here but if I can help at least one girl out than it will all be worth it to me. Here’s my story…

For almost a year I was together with a guy that I of course met in Punta Cana on a resort. He claimed to be an “instructor” but truthfully he is an “animator” at one of the nicer hotels in the area. We didn’t get intimate until several times after I visited there so of course off the bat I thought it would be different. I visited there almost every month (yes, every month) and we talked everyday. We pretty much traveled the country together and eventually I met his family and friends in Santo Domingo. Keep in mind that I am well aware of the “sankie” stories and the way things are there. Being a frequent traveler to the country I have witnessed many things and have met many women/men who have gotten caught up in these relationships. I actually saw the movie while there as well. I was critical about our relationship from the beginning but promised myself that I would do my best to give us a fair shot. I should have listened to my intuition and taken a good look in the mirror.

I cannot express to you the number of things that I found out. Emails, text messages, letters from women all over the world. Even his friends were ratting him out and telling me about other women, I even spoke with a few of the women via phone and email! But I was so ridiculously caught up in this relationship that I couldn’t let go. I was caught up in the sun, dancing, romance, affection, etc, etc, etc. It is easy for us to be blinded by the realities and aborbed in the place and time. The lack of trust and security that I began to feel transformed me into a person I simply am not. Which is what I think many of us who have been in these types of relationships can relate to?

I don’t regret my memories and experiences I had while traveling the country, I love the country and the people. But I was used, cheated on, deceived, and lied to. Bottom line is please don’t think that you are the only one. Because you are more than likely not. Even if he isn’t asking you for anything now, most sankies are intelligent and patient. They will wait. And believe me; it will start with something like a phone which will then be used to communicate with the other women. Even if he doesn’t tell you he loves you, or better yet that he loves you but is not in love with you, that doesn’t mean he does not have a hidden agenda. You are just one of the many women who will be a reoccurring visitor to his country. And let me tell you, many of these women don’t care about whether he has a girlfriend/wife or whatever else. They do not bother with the details nor do they care. I have reached out to many of the women I knew of trying to look out for them and they still go there to see him! So imagine truly how many people you have actually slept with and the dangers you are putting yourself in.

To make a long story short, don’t be like me. Don’t waste your time, money, and energy on someone who doesn’t deserve the person you are. I am a young educated girl who is ashamed that I allowed myself to be so stupid and naive. Remember this if anything, a person like this will never be able to offer you anything tangible and I know that to many of us that isn’t important. But the saddest part is that it’s the free things in life like love and honestly that they can only offer and that is more than likely going to be what is lacked the most.

Thanks for listening!!! Please feel free to send personal messages.

[drloca]

Glad you saw the light and moved on....and good that you realized you deserve better!

[Lady_Laura]

What the heck is it with those "resort workers" they are not even good looking.. Why do these women keep on falling for them???

[SamanaJon]

Porque pueden bailar...jejeje.... en la pista y en la cama...plus a few Barcelos or Brugals help as they are all beautiful at closing time...

Thats why???

Next question?

[dr_qt]

Although I do not like how AZB attacks posters, he gives good information. See below:



You obviously don't live here or know one of these resort workers at all. I have spent time with them in hotels when I used to visit POP since 1986 and let me tell you, I have spent a lot of time with them and watched then up close.
These guys in animation are only there to take advantage of you. At first they will show you a good time, take you home, cook for you and all. They even spend money and pay for themselves. No matter how you look at it,their friendship comes with a price. They will ask you for gifts, nike sneakers, clothes etc. Their problems never end. They take advantage of undesired women like lexi, give them false hopes and false love. They take money from them. Don't get fooled by lexi's account that he pays for everything, in reality, she spends a lot of money on him. She pays for his hotel, rented car and other other stuff. This guy has zero education, for that he was working in a hotel, the lowest form of job. I am sure he was not an accountant or a general manager at the hotel. These guys are out there to meet women like her and they have other women on the side just like her. She would be silly to think she is the only one in his life. I mean, hundreds of trashy north american women come to this island for black / white action.
She will be hurt later on, just like many others. We hear lots of success stories but these stories are only told when the relationship is hot, we rarely hear from the same ladies when the marriage turns sour and the man leaves or cheats on her. These guys have nothing to offer but their pipes. They can't hold a intellectual conversation with anyone. I bet most of these bimbos find these guys highly educated because they speak more than one language. hahahaha. Then again, these bimbos can't even find dominican republic's map on a world atlas so what do you expect from them? Bimbos deserve a donkies.

So I am sick of reading, he is so nice, not like others, he never asked me for money, I never give him anything, I met his family, they treated my like family, blah blah blah. All the same BS coming out of bimbo mouths. these fools deserve these donkeys. let them have all and please take them away. Do us all a favor, the decent proud dominicans will be grateful to you all. These guys can't do anything productive here, nor they are wanted here so why let them suffer in their ghettos when you can offer them a way out.

Please don't confuse these gutter rats with the hard working proud dominicans who happen to be poor financially. 2 different folks.
AZB

Unfortunately most victims of Sankies learn about their tricks after they are already "hooked" and then it may be too late.

[mountainfrog]

Welcome to the board, dmc1 (and in case you posted earlier and much happier: Welcome back! )!

Unfortunately your story will not change things, the holiday prostitution will go on and on...

The sankie trade flourishes.

m'frog

[dr_qt]

Originally Posted by mountainfrog

Welcome to the board, dmc1 (and in case you posted earlier and much happier: Welcome back! )!

Unfortunately your story will not change things, the holiday prostitution will go on and on...

The sankie trade flourishes.

m'frog

LOL M'frog is back!!

Watch out everyone!!

[aimelove]

Originally Posted by dr_qt

Although I do not like how AZB attacks posters, he gives good information. See below:



You obviously don't live here or know one of these resort workers at all. I have spent time with them in hotels when I used to visit POP since 1986 and let me tell you, I have spent a lot of time with them and watched then up close.
These guys in animation are only there to take advantage of you. At first they will show you a good time, take you home, cook for you and all. They even spend money and pay for themselves. No matter how you look at it,their friendship comes with a price. They will ask you for gifts, nike sneakers, clothes etc. Their problems never end. They take advantage of undesired women like lexi, give them false hopes and false love. They take money from them. Don't get fooled by lexi's account that he pays for everything, in reality, she spends a lot of money on him. She pays for his hotel, rented car and other other stuff. This guy has zero education, for that he was working in a hotel, the lowest form of job. I am sure he was not an accountant or a general manager at the hotel. These guys are out there to meet women like her and they have other women on the side just like her. She would be silly to think she is the only one in his life. I mean, hundreds of trashy north american women come to this island for black / white action.
She will be hurt later on, just like many others. We hear lots of success stories but these stories are only told when the relationship is hot, we rarely hear from the same ladies when the marriage turns sour and the man leaves or cheats on her. These guys have nothing to offer but their pipes. They can't hold a intellectual conversation with anyone. I bet most of these bimbos find these guys highly educated because they speak more than one language. hahahaha. Then again, these bimbos can't even find dominican republic's map on a world atlas so what do you expect from them? Bimbos deserve a donkies.


Unfortunately most victims of Sankies learn about their tricks after they are already "hooked" and then it may be too late.

It is kind of sad the amount of bitterness that I read in this thread. Everyone deserves to find someone who truly loves them for who they are, but you have to be smart and be realistic about your surroundings.
Another personal story.

My best friend for over 20 years lives in Atlanta, Georgia in the US. A few years ago he was dating a woman who worked as a cocktail waitress at a gentlemen's (strip) club. He met her there. Beautiful looking young lady. College educated, but chose to work at the strip club instead of the professional world because of how much money she was making from tips. 200 to 300 dollars per night sometimes on top of her paycheck. Drove a BMW and provided alot of material things for my friend. Clothes, sneakers etc. I never had to pay for a drink in her presence., which was pretty nice, although I didn't think she was the best choice for a long term girlfriend for my friend based on where she worked.

He started keeping other girlfriends on the side besides her. His excuse: he couldn't believe that she wasn't flirting with other men while she was working and felt better about himself having other women around. Despite this, I wished the best for the relationship. What happened? They couldn't trust each other and eventually she left him for somebody else she met at work. His infidelity didn't help (he claims she never found out anything), but the constant temptation from the men she met at work was another reason that the relationship was doomed. If she was a grocery store clerk or secretary maybe things would have been different. Maybe.

THE MORAL OF THE STORY. Some things just come with the territory. Some people are weak and let their environment change them. and you can't just pin the blame on the fact that these guys are Dominican.

Men are men. The straight ones are gonna test their limits and boundaries with women for various reasons. A guy who works an animation job at a resort is around women in an enclosed area without much competition from other guys for the attention of the women there. Most of the male guests are with a date or a wife. They can only look at the single women, but not get too fresh with them. Not an excuse. Just a fact. These women are on vacation, escaping from their daily life and drinking more than usually do. At most resorts its all you can drink.

Look at it through their eyes. OF COURSE THEY ARE GONNA SEE WHAT THEY CAN GET AWAY WITH. THEY ARE AT WORK, GETTING PAID AND MEETING AND HAVING SEX WITH DIFFERENT WOMEN WHO ARE COMING IN AND OUT OF YOUR PLACE OF BUSINESS ALL THE TIME AS A BONUS. Is it that difficult to grasp that concept? It all sounds pretty basic to me.

I didn't have the easiest time finding someone I wanted to share the rest of my life with. Actually I feel pretty lucky I'm married now. I'm not the easiest person to get along with. I got my issues just like everybody. I love women (especially attractive ones), but I always knew that women who work in a bar, strip club environment, flight attendent etc. might be nice to look at, but may not offer the long term happiness I was seeking. The cute pickup lines and flirting are used dozens of times daily with women who work at places like that. I still flirt a little now, but with very little fear of rejection because I have someone at home now. Not everyone is the same, but you have to know your surroundings whenever you are out there meeting people. What is hard to understand about that?

Earlier I posted that I feel its wrong to think you are better than someone who works for a living. I do. But that's different than looking for a mate.

[miguel]

All I can tell you is that I hope you learned your lesson and when the next guy comes, in your country or anywhere, that you follow your instincts and don't let your heart take control of your brain.

There's a reason why "red flags" are called "red flags". "Red flags" are not there for people to ignore them. Quite the opposite.

The moment you saw the "red flags", your next step was to protect your heart and the only way you can do that is to dump his axx right then and there!.

Now, it's time for you to take care of the person who should be the most important person in your life: You.

Now, it's time for you to move on and forget all the NONSENSE of you calling and warning other woman about him. It's not your place anymore.

And to be honest with you, why in hell do you care?. They will probably do the same thing you did when you found out: IGNORE the "red flags".

Move on......

Ps: Nice to see you back, Froggy!.

[dmc1]

As I stated, if I can help open the eyes to at least one girls that is good enough for me. There isnt much feedback given on this forum other than criticism and sarcasm. I thought it might be helpful to someone else out there to het some feedback other than just that.

Thanks for your comment though.