Am I _that_ silly?

alexis6 · #1 03-26-2008, 09:06 AM

Hi! I just got back 3 days ago from an amazing vacation in Puerto Plata with my parents and my best friend. I'm a student at NYU, am attractive and good looking with no problem finding men in NY, ( i dont mean to toot my own horn), yet for some reason I'm having a hard time figuring out if I've fallen for a sankie story. My friend I was on vaca with and I are not into the club scene back home, but figured since we were on vacation, we should just have fun. We stayed at the resort the first few nights, but did all the daily activities because we enjoy making fools of ourselves, and there I met one animation/fun club worker...He didn't say anything out of the ordinary to me during the day, yet I also saw him at the hotel bar that night. he then proceeded to tell me he liked me and that he would have spoken to me earlier but he was afraid of my parents (especially my 6'2 father!) so then he told me he wanted me to go to a local club and that i should follow him there....he was gorgeous and was really light skinned with green eyes (not contacts lol), so i obviously wanted to go..we had made friends with a group of people our age (early 20's) from Jersey, so we were already hanging with them, so my best friend decided she didn't want to go to the club and wanted to stay with the Jersey crew instead. Fine by me, but nevertheless i was still sad we didn't go...the next night he found me again and kept saying he was sad that i didnt go, etc, sad all morning, all afternoon, etc.. that happened to be our last night, and we hadn't even danced together! he said how he liked me, wanted to kiss me, and for us to go to the club..but this time my friend just flat out said no ( i think he hated her at that point), but he said that he would be at the hotel's mini disco in a little...we were headed there anyway so we went, and he never showed up..a.t this point in was annoyed because i thought it was retaliation for me standing him up the night before (ha such NY thinking), so whatever. The next day we were leaving and i went to their area so i could by a CD i wanted and i saw him and he did nothing but apologize for not going to the mini disco, and how he still wanted to kiss me though, and how sweet i was..that's what made me think twice about him, he was more like a shy, sweet little boy that a smooth talking guy--he would actually blush when he told me he liked me, and would seem almost embarrassed that he was saying it.. we exchanged phone numbers and he did call me this morning telling me he'd call me later on tonight after the show. so after this whole long story (sorry!) im just a little confused---we didnt even kiss, obviously didnt sleep together, and i didnt even have a chance to be with him off the resort at a club to see if he would make me pay for drinks or not..we basically had no contact expect for during the day during water aerobics, dance lessons, and at the bar at night for like 30 mins...so what's the deal? i doubt he could genuinely want to be starting a relationship, but i haven't given him anything, and he hasn't given me anything to keep clinging for more....i mean i'm not gonna fall for the guy, i'm just in need of some insight please!

AnnaC · #2 03-26-2008, 09:21 AM

The deal here is that spare tires are always a good thing to have. I'm sure he has plenty of names and phone numbers in reserve and he'll be working on your emotions until you return for a second trip.

Having many tourist women on the hook comes in handy for many reasons.

We see his reasons very clearly so I'll give you an article to read so you'll understand the sanky mind Sanky Pankies in the Dominican Republic

Good luck and don't worry about it too much, he's working on a new busload as we write this.

miguel · #3 03-26-2008, 09:53 AM

Your story is NOT unique.

Your story is NOT difficult to understand.

Bottom line, he is playing with your emotions....That's what they do.

In his eyes, you did NOT go to the club when he invited you, therefore you played "hard to get".....

Then he needed to teach you a lesson and decided NOT to go to the mini-disco knowing you were going to be there.....But also knowing that it would make you look for him, think of him and wonder what happened to him.

He just planted "the seed" playing the game they usually play and guess what, as MANY do, YOU are falling for it.......YOU are doing EXACTLY what he thought you were going to do.....Start falling for him.

Go read some of the threads in the Sankie Forum and you will figure out yourself that he is just playing with your emotions.

It's a game to them.

Just get on your knees and thank your lucky star you did NOT sleep with him!. (Or kiss him YUCK!).

AAAAAND while at it...throw his phone number away, do NOT pick up the phone when he calls, cancel your email address (if he has it) and run, run, RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN away from him as fast as you can.

TRUST me, YOU WILL thank us later.

Btw: How old are you that he did NOT want to talk to you when your parents were around?. Yeah, another game they play since they know SOME adults CAN see through them!.

alexis6 · #4 03-26-2008, 10:32 AM

wow, ok thanks for all that..i figured that's what you all would say, which is what I need to hear! sometimes that brain of ours doesnt work- what a shame though since i spnet enough on a college education to develop it lol

I'm 22 btw to answer your question, old enough to be on my own w/o my parents, which is why my friend and I broke away after the show, but we were there for my mother's birthday...the animation guy said he was scared of my father, which I would be too honestly if I didnt know he was the sweetest man out there lol

Hillbilly · #5 03-26-2008, 02:16 PM

Since I'm a former Jersey guy (Bergen County--Ridgewood), with four decades + in this country, please take what i say to heart.

You were played like a violin, which is fine. In the Northern Climes, we do not allow such rapid emotional ploys. In the tropics, it is the norm at all vacation spots.

Like "miguel" told you, this is par for the course. i am reminded of the old tale my mother once told me of the guy walking down the street with a black eye. A friend asked "Why the black eye?"
The guy says: "Oh a woman socked me in the eye"
Friend: "Why?"
"Oh I just asked her for a kiss. I ask all the good looking women I see for a kiss!"
"What???"
" Yeah"

" But, don't they tell you to go to hell?"
" Well, most of them do, BUT SOME DON'T!!"

And that dear lady is the message....

Throw away the phone number, do not accept calls, and do not answer his poorly written emails...

With cordial respect,

HB

Thegirlnextdoor · #6 03-26-2008, 03:01 PM

Most definately playin' you, take it from someone who's been there..

Berzin · #7 03-26-2008, 06:03 PM

Lucky for you you found us here on DR1...

jruane44 · #8 03-26-2008, 07:11 PM

Being a student from NYU you should be a bright young lady. Would you ever date a dishwasher? Would you ever give the time of day to the guy that dries your car after coming out of a carwash? How about a busboy? I'm not talking about the guy who's working his way through school. Would you ever date a high school drop out in NY? This is the guy in the DR. Uneducated with little or no ambition in life. Move on and like others said drop him like a hot potato.

Berzin · #9 03-26-2008, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jruane44

Being a student from NYU you should be a bright young lady. Would you ever date a dishwasher? Would you ever give the time of day to the guy that dries your car after coming out of a carwash? How about a busboy? I'm not talking about the guy who's working his way through school. Would you ever date a high school drop out in NY? This is the guy in the DR. Uneducated with little or no ambition in life. Move on and like others said drop him like a hot potato.

She actually(if her story is true) didn't do anything wrong. It was good that she didn't go anywhere or do anything with him. So let us give her credit for that.

All she needs to know is that as a resort worker, he will hit on every female tourist he can. That is the MO of a sanky. Now that she knows she doesn't have to worry about getting played, regardless of how green his eyes are.

johne · #10 03-26-2008, 08:23 PM

Since I pay a monthly note to a student loan for my 22 y.o. that graduated from NYU last May, let me say that your father should be first worried about 39 run on sentences in one paragraph. The four year program for $140,000 should at LEAST teach you how to write to Abby for advise and perhaps teach you about common sense.

Other than that, welcome to dr1.

Still bleeding,
JOHN